- Kelly Blakesly (31) tied the knot with Nick (33) in June last year – and he encouraged her to go on a date with her now-boyfriend Jon Steel (41) four months into their marriage.
- The three are now living together and planning to have a family in future.
- The two men are not dating each other, however they are all open to dating other people.
Kelly met Jon on a dating site in November last year and was a little apprehensive about meeting up with him as it was only a few months after she got married to Nick.
“But Nick said ‘if you have enough love to give then go for it – at least you will get a free coffee!'” Jon’s marriage had previously ended due to an affair.
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The first thing Kelly did was tell John about her husband and he was open with me about his past.
“He has been monogamous but cheated, which led to an affair – he said an open relationship sounds like something he might need as he previously needed something more,” Kelly shares.
“I appreciated his honesty and it has helped us grow stronger. Sometimes, Jon is a little too honest and tells me everything about someone he has met up with and I have to tell him to stop.”
The British throuple share a king-size bed – despite the men not being in a relationship.
Kelly, a former support worker, insists their relationship is like no other. She says she now has ‘less bed space and food in the cupboards’ as she is living with the two men in her life.
“It is a strange concept – even for me, but it is quite liberating. I was brought up in a traditional family and grew up to believe you are meant to stick with one person for the rest of your life,” she says.
“I had only ever been exposed to polyamorous relationships through TV, which had negative connotations such as one man cheating with multiple women. But I am not cheating – Nick and I are honest with one another.”
Kelly says for her, polyamory isn’t about sex – it is about an emotional connection. “I am in a committed relationship with both of my partners and I can see a future with both of them. People assume we are all in a relationship, but that is not the case – I am the pivot between them,” Kelly explains.
All of them are able to date other people while in the relationship. “Initially, I was jealous but I, know now that I have something with both of them that nobody else could give and we will be together forever,” she says.
We don’t have any boundaries but everything has to be spoken about – we always make sure we tell each other if we are speaking to another person, so we know the other is going on a date the following week.”
They have discussed starting a family in the future and both men intend on raising the child as their own.
They will get a DNA test for the child too. Kelly describes herself as ‘lucky’ as she is taken on individual dates by both partners.
“It can be difficult having an emotional connection with two men at the same time. But the pros outweigh the cons – whenever I am flustered and infuriated, I have Jon to calm me down so I can speak to Nick rationally. I am spoilt but I am humble about it,” Kelly says, adding that she is sharing her story in a bid to normalise polyamorous relationships.
Kelly says, “Our situation blows people’s minds and we are not doing it for the shock factor. Other cultures are accepted in society, so why isn’t this?”
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Story by @polyamorous.gal / CATERS NEWS/MAGAZINEFEATURES.CO.ZA