It’s not about size, but style

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IT seems the size of the one-eyed weasel does not matter much, but the biggest problem most women face is the issue of its peak in the sack.

The biggest problem is when it fails to deliver and that is when he ‘‘cums’’ within a twinkle of an eye when the woman is just beginning to have a feel of it. It is strange that some women always associate the ‘‘cuming’’ issue with the size of the one-eyed weasel, but hey those are two different problems. Someone can have a big one, but still fail to last longer as expected.

The size does not determine whether the man will peak early or late in the sack!

The problem is called premature ejaculation meaning ‘‘cuming’’ too quickly and it is one of the most common sexual problems. I understand that some men do not even last two minutes inside, leaving their partners hanging . . . and I guess it is painful to be left still expecting more.

Women with partners who have premature ejaculation are unhappy and frustrated and this has ruined many marriages because it spoils their sex life. Couples who try to ignore the problem are making things worse as this is one issue couples should be open about.

As a woman, you do not have to be hard on your man because of ‘‘cuming’’ too quickly, but support him and tackle the problem together. At times, the way you raise the issue to your man can really destroy him because before you even discuss the problem, he is aware of it as well.

Most men who have the problem end up giving up on playing the adult game in a bid to avoid criticism they get from their partners after the game. Remember men and their ego!

A man’s perception of his own penis size can have an impact on confidence and a positive body image. Men who are self-conscious about the size of their penis, either in its flaccid or erect state, may experience anxiety-induced erectile dysfunction and other emotional problems.

Sisters, never blame or shame your partner for ‘‘cuming’’ too early. You have to understand that it does happen and one thing I have heard is that women usually say, “Do not be selfish, wait for me.”

If the man ejaculates before his partner has also reached the big ‘‘O’’ they then blame them for not being loving partners, which is not right. Early ejaculation has nothing to do with love!

If you are a woman and you are in a relationship with an early ejaculator, know that he never does that on purpose, but has a problem and I do not want to call it an illness. Do not think that they are selfish.

Most early ejaculators are anxious men who tend to become over excited quickly. When they are anxious and highly aroused, the minute he enters a woman, he will be at the point of no return and therefore ejaculating early. Bear with such men, knowing that they need a second round and by then they will be stable and are likely to last longer. If your man has such a problem, then as a woman you have to accept that one round is not for you!

The other thing you can do as a woman is reminding the man to relax both mentally and physically. It helps to slow the man down!

When you touch your man, your touch should be designed to keep him minimally aroused and not to send him rushing headlong in the direction of his ejaculatory threshold.

There are exercises called start-stop exercises that couples can do together to help a man relax, calm his excitement and be able to control his ‘‘cuming’’. You have to understand that early ejaculators can not anticipate that point of no return and are typically not aware of it until they are already there, which will be already too late.

As a woman you have to restore his ego as most of early ejaculators see themselves as sexual failures so singing him praises in bed might be of great help. You can still enjoy the adult game by letting him orally stimulate you to orgasm!

The other thing which couples can do is using the position where the woman gets on top. When on top, you slide back and forth rather than up and down as it minimises stimulation for the male. The other advantage of this position is that you get more clitoral stimulation when on top and are in control!

Sisters, for your sex life to be the best, bear in mind that in good sex, there are no demands made and no judgements passed. As a woman you have to be persistent in teaching your partner that there is more to making love than just doing it! In a caring and intimate relationship, there is never a failure!